This Friday, March 2, is Employee Appreciation Day. And while it might be nice to have a day designated as Employee Appreciation Day, every day should be Employee Appreciation Day in your office! That’s right. Every day.
Why Appreciation is So Important
In the book, How Full is Your Bucket?, by Tom Rath and Donald O. Clifton, the authors cite a U.S. Department of Labor Study that found the #1 reason people leave their jobs is because they don’t feel appreciated on a day-to-day basis. But people who do feel appreciated are more likely to be “engaged.” An engaged employee: shows up on time (or early), stays late when needed, smiles, shows enthusiasm, is a great ambassador for the firm and recruits other engaged employees.
On the other hand, people who don’t feel appreciated are more likely to be “actively disengaged” from work. You do not want actively disengaged people working for you. An actively disengaged employee will not only make your life miserable, he’ll tell others that your firm is a horrible place to work.
Show Your Appreciation
So how do you make sure your employees are engaged and not disengaged? It’s really simpler than you may think. Show your genuine appreciation for the work they do. Not just one or two days a year, but every day. Say “thank you” for even the little things. It’s OK – really – and it doesn’t cost you anything.
The Losada Line
Research by psychologist and business consultant, Marcial Losada, and reported in The Happiness Advantage, by Shawn Achor, found that it takes about three positive comments to offset one negative comment. And the very best, most productive teams have a ratio of about 6 to 1.
Get Specific About the Good Stuff
Have you ever noticed that when you’re giving someone constructive criticism, you’re very specific? Yet, when you praise someone it’s usually a very general, “Nice job!” Guess what? Our brains remember the specific, not the general. That’s why we can remember a piece of stinging criticism for years, but have trouble remembering a time when we felt truly appreciated. So get specific with your praise.
Make Appreciation a Daily Habit
If you show your appreciation daily, remember the Losada Line, and get specific with your praise, your employees will show their appreciation by showing up engaged – not disengaged. It won’t cost you a penny, and you’ll create a happier and much more productive office. Like the Beatles said: Money can’t buy you love. And all the money in the world can’t buy an engaged employee.
Click here for a great TED Talk on “The Happy Secret to Better Work,” by Shawn Achor.
Thanksgiving is right around the corner. I’ll admit, this is my favorite time of year. – Fall, the Holidays, New Year’s. These are the harbingers of renewal. The New Year is on the way. It’s the perfect time to reflect and give thanks.
This time of year can also be very stressful and a time when many feel the effects of burnout and depression. But there is something you can do to alleviate the stress: Give back. I know what you’re thinking, “Is she crazy? I’m already swamped at this time of year, and she’s asking me to do something else!?!?” The answer is: Yes, I am. Here’s why.
Giving back creates what psychologists call a “helper’s high.” A “helper’s high” is a state of euphoria created by a release of endorphins in the brain. That’s a good thing.
When we’re motivated by a true spirit of generosity, we benefit as much as those on the receiving end. Jesuit priest Anthony de Mello says it this way: “Charity is really self-interest masquerading under the form of altruism. … I give myself the pleasure of pleasing others.” In the same vein, the Dalai Lama playfully speaks of working to benefit others as “selfish altruism.”
But don’t just take their words for it: Research in neuroscience and psychology has offered scientific evidence that helping others brings happiness to yourself. Consider:
According to the measures the “Social Capital Community Benchmark Survey,” overseen by researchers from Harvard University, those who gave contributions of time or money were “42 percent more likely to be happy” than those who didn’t give.
From The Helper’s High, click here to read the entire article.
So, how can you get your own “helper’s high”? Think of ways that you and your team can give back in a way that’s fun and fulfilling. Here are just a few ideas. Brainstorm others with your team.
• Adopt a family (or families) for the holidays.
• Collect toys to bring to kids in the hospital.
• Visit a nursing home.
• Mentor a child.
• Adopt a school in your neighborhood.
• Donate clothing.
• Give to Toys for Tots or another organization.
• Sponsor a food drive for a local food bank.
Choose something that you can do as a firm, and get everyone involved. Nothing will make you feel better this Holiday Season than giving thanks and giving back. Your “helper’s high” might feel so great that you continue your project throughout the year!
I’m reading Enchantment: The Art of Changing Hearts, Minds, and Actions, by Guy Kawasaki. According to the bio on his website, Guy was previously the chief evangelist of Apple. While that may be accurate, he is so much more. He is a phenomenal communicator and connector. And Enchantment is a book all attorneys should read. Why? Because all attorneys are in the business of changing hearts, minds and actions. All attorneys need to be enchanting.
Let’s look at just one nugget of gold from Enchantment – How to Achieve Likability. Buy the book for this chapter alone. The most important thing you can do to market your practice is to build “know, like and trust” with your influencers and referral sources. Enchantment will help you do this . . . and it will enchant you along the way. Read Enchantment and your approach to marketing will never be the same. You’ll understand why it’s important to: smile like George Clooney; shake hands . . . and connect; create real win-win solutions; and NOT speak like a lawyer.
And while we’re on the subject of likeability check out: 16 Enlightening Communication Principles at Dan Rockwell’s blog, Leadership Freak. The words we speak – or choose not to speak – have a tremendous impact on our likeability. I read Dan’s blog post yesterday, and it reminded me how much words matter. Here are the 16 Principles.
Flatterers puff you up so you’ll lift them up.
Backstabbers secretly invite you to condemn yourself by inviting you to condemn others.
Always answer a question with a question.
Casually spoken words cut. Stop blabbing.
The rule for words is restraint: fewer words are better than many words. Churchill said, “We are masters of the unsaid words, but slaves of those we let slip out.”
Words limit and create bondage like a snare. Avoid unnecessary promises and commitments.
Life giving words are intentional; seldom accidental.
Intentionally energize rather than accidentally demotivate with your words.
Harsh words invite harshness.
Gentle words drain drama and anger.
Quiet words enable better than loud words.
Loud words excite or overwhelm; more frequently they overwhelm.
Avoid whisperers they manipulate.
Behaviorally speaking lying is hatred.
Never publicly improve the boss’s words.
Embrace the two to one rule. Ask two questions – at a minimum – before making statements.
If you can enchant and enlighten in all your communications, you can change the world one person - or conversation - at a time.
Are there any other principles you would add to Dan’s list?
I spoke with two clients today, who, during the course of our coaching calls said to me, “Nora, I’ll try.” Every time I hear those words, I think of Yoda and one of my favorite quotes. It’s from Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back. Whenever you are making changes in your life, you can’t try to make the change. You’ve got to do it. Or in the words of the Jedi master: “No! Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try.”
As I drove back to my office from my neighborhood Starbucks this morning, I thought to myself, “Ah, now I get to go to work.” I paused for a moment and thought how nice that was. I didn’t say to myself, “I have to go to work.” What do you say to yourself in the morning?
I hope you get to go to work in the morning. I hope you love what you do, love how you help your clients, and have some fun in the process. And I hope everyone who works with you feels as though they “get to” go to work in the morning, too. If you’re doing what you love and are surrounded by the right people, you’ll get to go to work every day. If not, you’ll have to go to work. And if you feel like you have to go to work, it’s time to take a look at your life and your practice.
So I say, “Get your “get to” on!”
If you think all of this talk about having fun is just fluffy, mubmo jumbo, take a look at the hard science behind happiness at Shawn Achor’s website or check out his book, The Happiness Advantage.
As a coach and consultant for attorneys, I’m in the “change business.” I work with attorneys every day who are working toward making positive changes in their lives and practices. It’s not an easy process. Even good change can be scary. And what’s more, research tells us that it takes most people about six attempts at making a change before it really sticks.
Recently, I had the opportunity to meet William Anton, PhD at a workshop for Family Law attorneys in Tampa, where we were both presenters. I spoke about using social media to market your Family Law practice (download my materials). He spoke about resistance to change. – Not only about how we react to change on a personal level, but about how resistance to change manifests itself in the workplace. He spoke about – wait a minute. Rather than me telling you what he spoke about, check out the four-part video on his website. I promise you’ll have a much deeper understanding of why it’s hard to change your behavior – even if you want to.
Most of us have heard the expression “attitude of gratitude.” The idea of being grateful for the good things in life is a simple one. But as simple as it sounds, gratitude is a demanding and complex emotion that is not easy to cultivate, according to Dr. Robert Emmons, a pioneer in gratitude research at the University of California.
Dr. Emmons’ research has shown that maintaining an attitude of gratitude is good for you. In fact, an attitude of gratitude can improve your overall health, including your psychological, emotional and physical well-being. A recent Wall Street Journal article reported that “being grateful forces people to overcome what psychologists call the ‘negativity bias’ – the tendency to dwell on problems, annoyances and injustices rather than upbeat events.” Focusing on what’s good in your life can also help you ward off depression and deal more effectively with stress.
In his book, 365 Thank Yous: The Year a Simple Act of Daily Gratitude Changed my Life, attorney John Kralik tells of how his commitment to writing a thank you note every day for a year truly changed his life. Kralik focused on the art of the thank you note to cultivate his attitude of gratitude. What can you do?
The beginning of a new year is a great time to create an attitude of gratitude in your life. Begin now to create your “attitude of gratitude.” Why not start by writing a thank you note to each of your best referral sources? Keep it simple. – Just a few sentences. If you need some ideas to get started, check out this article from NPR about Kralik’s book, Perfect Thank You Notes: Heartfelt and Handwritten.
“Can you believe that next week is Thanksgiving?” Several people have asked me that question over the past couple of days. And, no, I really can’t. Where did the year go? It seems as though the time is flying by for all of us. 2011 is right around the corner.
So, have you thought about where you want to be a year from now? Thanksgiving is a perfect time to reflect on the past year and think about where you want to be next Thanksgiving. In fact, envisioning your future is a great way to create your personal magnet that will pull you toward that future. Here’s the thing: If you don’t know where you want to be a year from now, how are you going to get there?
In his book, The E-Myth Revisited, author Michael Gerber recounts a story about Tom Watson, the founder of IBM explaining the phenomenal success of the company.
“IBM is what it is today for three special reasons. The first reason is that, at the very beginning, I had a very clear picture of what the company would look like when it was finally done. You might say I had a model in my mind of what would look like when the dream — my vision — was in place.
The second reason was that once I had that picture, I then asked myself how a company which looks like that would have to act. I then created a picture of how IBM would act was finally done.
The third reason IBM has been so successful was that once I had a picture of how IBM would look when the dream was in place and how such a company would have to act, I then realized that, unless we began to act that way from the very beginning, we would never get there.
In other words, I realized that for IBM to become a great company it would have to act like a great company long before it ever became one.”
Watson is talking about the power of acting “as if” you’ve already achieved your goals. If you know what you want and where you want to be, start now acting “as if” you’re already there. You will be astounded at the changes you’ll see in your life.
It was fifty years ago today, July 11, 1960, that Harper Lee’s classic “To Kill a Mockingbird,” was published. And today I pulled my copy of the shelf to begin reading it . . . again. Many more eloquent writers than I have written more than I ever could about the significance of “Mockingbird,” as Lee refers to the book. So instead of writing about the book, I’ll share one of my favorite quotes from Atticus: “I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It’s when you know you’re licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what. You rarely win, but sometimes you do.”
This Friday, March 2, is Employee Appreciation Day. And while it might be nice to have a day designated as Employee Appreciation Day, every day should be Employee Appreciation Day in your office! That’s right. Every day.
Thanksgiving is right around the corner. I’ll admit, this is my favorite time of year. – Fall, the Holidays, New Year’s. These are the harbingers of renewal. The New Year is on the way. It’s the perfect time to reflect and give thanks.
As I drove back to my office from my neighborhood Starbucks this morning, I thought to myself, “Ah, now I get to go to work.” I paused for a moment and thought how nice that was. I didn’t say to myself, “I have to go to work.” What do you say to yourself in the morning?
Most of us have heard the expression “attitude of gratitude.” The idea of being grateful for the good things in life is a simple one. But as simple as it sounds, gratitude is a demanding and complex emotion that is not easy to cultivate, according to 
